WRPK in New Albertastan
A pair of lovable know-nothing zealots engage in hilarious hijinks as they battle creeping socialism and corporate welfare in the prairie heartland.
Episode 2: Jaws of Life/Jaws of Debt
Scene: Vehicle interior at night
Brian: (Driving. Thumps the wheel angrily) This is taking forever! Damn Notley and her highway improvements!
Derek: Easy boss, I just bought this baby.
Brian: Sorry Derek, wouldn’t want to hurt your Hummer. But you know why I hate highways? It’s big government telling ya this is the way ya gotta go. Ya wanna get from Bonnyville to Cold Lake? Big government says ya gotta take the 28.
Derek: We could’a taken the 41 through LaCorey…
Brian: (glares) Do you mind, Derek? I’m philosophizing. See, when we settled this land, covered wagons crossing the prairie could go anyway they wanted. Sure you could follow the trail, but an enterprising guy could just blaze his own trail if he wanted, maybe even find a better one.
Derek: Totally agreed, boss. Off-road capability is essential to entrepreneurial spirit. It’s like you always say, boss…
Brian and Derek: Never trust a guy who doesn’t own a Ski-doo.
Brian: Hey, this new baby of yours got off-road capability?
Derek: You betcha! And a power winch.
Brian: Tighten yer belt, Derek, we’re blazing our own trail all the way to Cold Lake!
Derek: (Out the window) So long, suckers. Enjoy your little Notley-jam!
Thump, thump, bang.
State-mandated airbags deploy.
A professional and efficient EMT team, funded by Alberta Healthcare arrives and extricates our heroes.
No WRP officials were harmed in the writing of this sketch.